Recently, I posted an article titled "I Hate Cancer," chronicling my father's diagnosis of pancreatic cancer. While still in shock, my family struggled to find answers and a positive supportive doctor.   An informative book I highly recommend to others in a like situation is AfterShock: What to Do When the Doctor Gives You--or Someone You Love--a Devastating Diagnosis, by Jessie Gruman, Ph.D.

Dr. Gruman is the founder and president of the Center for the Advancement of Health, and independent, nonpartisan Washington-based policy institute.  The center works to help people use good scientific information when making decisions about their health and health care.  Most importantly, Dr. Gruman herself has received blowing shocks from doctors after being diagnosed with cancers and a heart condition.

AfterShock is for anyone who has received a negative diagnosis of AIDS, cancer, ALS, HIV, Alzheimer's disease, MS, or any other life-threatening condition.  It's frightening not just for the individual, but also for his or her family.  Dr. Gruman outlines how to respond to the shock, learn about the condition and treatments available, decide whether or not to involve others, find the right doctors and hospitals, get timely medical appointments, find second opinions, manage the working life, pay for the care, find relief, and finally take further steps.

Typically, as the patient or family member, we all react differently to shocks with feelings of unfairness, crying, rage, withdrawal, or running thoughts.  We might also be confused, forgetful, or experience mood swings.  Dr. Gruman says to watch out for confusion of signs of shock with symptoms of the condition.  She lists common physical responses to shock as: crying, appetitie disruption, stomachache, headache, heightened sensitivity to normal physical complaints, lethargy, agitation, hyperactivity, or sleep disturbances.

What to do:  Begin to calm down.  Obviously this is "easier said than done," and may take time.  But Dr. Gruman suggests what worked for her and others:

Pet the dog or cat. Walk to the store.  Pay bills. Call your minister.  Or eat ice cream.

Fill in the time between diagnosis and waiting for the test results, around 48 hours. My dad did this too.  We debated about demanding a referral to an oncologist before the sample of brushings was retrieved.  For us, every day counted.  Like everyone else does, we felt a sense of urgency--Dad saw three oncologists and settled on the last one.

Be calm and don't make rash decisions.

Update on Oct 5, 2007 by Editor

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